By Buster Gunning Well it is official, Fidel ?El Presidente? Castro has won the big bet against his political Rival George Bush. As part of the agreement, Cuba gets to take back Gloria and Emilio Estefan back into their communist domicile. However, the Estefan?s are nowhere to be found and El Presidente is becoming quite impatient. ?President Bush has no spine and is not a man of his word.? These the harsh words from Cuba?s leader Fidel Castro to Mr. Bush. ?My team dominated his lackluster USA squad in the World Baseball Classic and now I want the Estefan?s back! The proletariat will not rest until Emilio and Gloria are safe on Cuban soil!? In the worst political dilemma since the Cuban Missile Crisis, the United States Government is now desperately searching for the suave-Latin Estefan duo. Sources close to the two entertainers say they are refusing to return to Cuba due to what they call ?the higher taxes? that come with a Socialist/Communist government. President Bush was not available for comment; however Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was available to comment on the growing crisis. ?We do not know much of these ?Cubans? but rest assured, they are the enemy. I will not rest until this terrorists and fascist region is brought to their knees. It is too early to tell, however, I am almost positive that this ?El Presidente? has ties to terrorists as well. Also, we have no idea where the Estefan siblings are. Who would have thought the Cubans would make it to the Finals while the United States loses at home to Mexico?? Elian Gonzalez was also unavailable for comment. Buster Gunning is currently smuggling molasses out of Havana, he can be reached occasionally at: [email protected] The preceding article was a piece of satirical fiction.