By Buster Gunning Though I spent a nice year and a month in Colorado, I couldn?t be more pissed off about the Rockies going to the World Series. I absolutely hate it when expansion teams win anything. There is no greater affront to sports than this. It diminishes everything! This season of expansion success began in February when Peyton Manning?s Johnny-come latelys won the Super Bowl. The Miami Seahawks/Baltimore Colts/Indianapolis Colts, led by football royalty or not, cheapened the Vince Lombardi trophy by beating the Chicago Bears (aka the Decatur Staleys), the oldest team in the NFL. Then came the horrible NBA playoffs, when the ABA leftover San Antonio Spurs (formerly known as the Dallas Chaparrals) beat the expansion Cleveland Cavaliers. Now, the Rockies (and their humidor) are in the World Series. These purple and silver commies are trying to ?mess up history? as much as the unoriginal egomaniac Marc Ecko. I thoroughly enjoyed going to Rockies' games and mocked them for how they celebrated their ?Wild Card Championship? on the left field fence. I trace this expansion trend to 1986 when the New York Mets beat the Boston Red Sox to win the World Series. Unlike that choke-job, the 2007 American League representative must slay this expansion dragon, who will cheat (re: Matt Holliday's phantom slide), kill (the Philly Phanatic has gone missing) and steal (keep your eyes on Chief Wahoo and Wally the Green Monster) to win. The preceding article is a piece of satirical fiction.