Don?t ever tell me how the hot team at the end of the regular season has the upper hand going into the playoffs. I don?t want to hear it. Ever again. If that were the case, the Dodgers would?ve met the Twins in the World Series. The Padres would?ve bounced the almost-lost-the-division-in-the-last-week-of-the-season Cardinals out in the first round. The Tigers would be home. The A?s would?ve succumbed to the mighty Twins and Johan Santana. Which reminds me. All year long, all we heard was, no one wants to face the Twins in a five-game series with Santana and Franciso Liriano pitching Games 1 and 2. When Liriano went down, all we heard was, no one can beat the Twins in a five-game series with Santana pitching Games 1 and 5. Well, guess what. The Twins and Santana have lost three out of four first-round series ? none of which went the distance. This year, the Twins became the new A?s. The Tigers became last year?s White Sox. The Yankees became the Braves. Jeff Weaver became the new Jered Weaver. Alex Rodriguez became Mr. May. Carlos Delgado became Mr. October. Which reminds me. A-Rod was vilified for his numbing .071 performance in the ALDS. History will show that the man everyone assumes is the Yankees? Mr. Clutch, Derek Jeter, batted .500. However, after going 5-5 in Game 1, Jeter went a quiet 3-11, with no RBI, in the last three losses. What?s so clutch about that? History will also show that Corey Lidle?s ERA for the playoffs was 20.25. Fortunately, he will be remembered for a lot more than his stats. David Wright has not been the same player since taking part in the Home Run Derby at the All-Star Game. Steve Trachsel, who waited 35 years to pitch in a playoff game, showed why some guys should be careful what they wish for. The Tigers haven?t lost since the Yankees made them wait an extra nine minutes to find out that Game 2 had been postponed by rain. Never in MLB history had the Yankees been eliminated on the same day the Mets advanced. Latest annual Yankee playoff occurrence: the aging pitcher whose body breaks down. Randy Johnson followed in the footsteps of El Duque and David Wells. If the Mets don?t make it to the World Series, El Duque wants you to know he?s still ready to pitch. If there?s any player the Designated Hitter was created for, it?s Cliff Floyd. The last time the Mets came home trailing 3-2 in a playoff series, they had to face Roger Clemens in Game 6. If the Mets make it to Game 7, they should have the bullpen start and let Tom Glavine pitch in relief. If Glavine was this flat on four days rest, I?d hate to see how he would?ve pitched on Monday. Mookie Wilson should throw out the first ball for Game 6. Last time the Padres won the NL West on the last day of the season, then lost in the first round to St. Louis: 1996. What are the odds: twice in four years, on the same day against the Oakland A?s-- Torii Hunter dove for a line drive in center field and missed, turning it into an inside-the-park home run. How does Tim McCarver know that Dodger pitchers are taught to throw at hitters to thwart a suicide squeeze? When was the last time you saw Greg Maddux give up five straight hits with two out? Scott Spezio?s red soul patch would be a lot less amusing if he didn?t hit so well with men on base. If the Cardinals win the NLCS, what will Scott Rolen spray Tony La Russa with? The playoffs are a lot less fun this year without the Braves to make fun of. Kenny Rogers and Jeff Weaver are the latest pitchers to revive their careers after disastrous stints in New York. Has any notable pitcher ever revived his career IN New York? Besides David Wells? I really want to know. Am I crazy, or did Milton Bradley look like he wanted to join the celebrating Tigers after they eliminated the A?s? Am I crazy, or does every ball hit in Shawn Green?s direction wind up a triple? Speaking of Green, the relay that cut down two Dodger base-runners at home plate in Game 1 of the NLDS involved three ex-Dodgers (Green-to-Valentin-to-LoDuca). One of the base-runners was an ex-Met (Jeff Kent). Billy Beane fired Art Howe after he couldn?t get the A?s out of the first round. Ken Macha finally did, and Beane fired him. What am I missing here? Last time the Tigers and Cardinals met in the World Series, America was divided over an unpopular war. Good to know things have changed in thirty-eight years.