Nomar batted like a fidgety four-year-old boy, impatient for every pitch, rarely waiting for the right ball to swing at. It wasn’t a Moneyball approach that’s so popular today. It was a backwards approach to hitting like the name Ramon.
Albert Pujols, Tim Lincecum and Roy Halladay were amongst baseball's best players again in 2009, but also joining them were Zack Greinke, Justin Verlander, Joe Mauer, Prince Fielder and Felix Hernandez.
The Dodgers finished the season with the best Opsera in all of baseball, followed by the Yankees and surprisingly the Atlanta Braves.
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By Buster Gunning
Josh Hamilton may have lifted the spirits of the bored, homerun-hungry 2008 All-Star crowd with his long home runs and storied past; however, the real story was the disastrous debut of what would have been Major League Baseball’s oldest rookie pitcher 71-year-old Clay Council.
The focus on surprise slugger Josh Hamilton may have been a distraction from the real tragedy that painfully unfolded before the eyes of millions of rabid All-Star Home Run Derby spectators.
Now, less than a week after the meltdown, I have been granted an exclusive interview with the man who worked so hard to infiltrate the MLB, only to fall ridiculously short of his Major League dreams.
Buster – Clay, thank you so very much for being here, I can’t imagine what it is like for you to be seen at your local neighborhood restaurant Applebee’s so soon after your less than miserable pitching debut.
Clay – Well, at first Buster, I didn’t think I could do this interview; however, the promise of extreme Jalapeño Poppers was too much to resist.
Buster – Let’s get right to this. Why’d you choke out there, Clay? I had a lot riding on you, emotionally and financially you know.
Clay – Well, I have been playing baseball since I was 6. I had been close to cracking Single A a few times but just couldn’t get my ERA below 10.00. As a result, I settled on coaching high school baseball. After a few decades of trying to live vicariously through my pupils, I found one talent that was sure to take ME to the top.
Buster – That Hamilton guy?
Clay – The same. Anyway, after Josh was drafted #1, I was sure to ride his coattails to a monster MLB career.
After a few years of training and heavy steroid abuse I got my big break. Josh was clean and asked me to pitch to him in the 2008 Home Run Derby.
Buster – So what went wrong?
Clay – That ungrateful little [expletive deleted]. I threw my best stuff out there, and he shelled me on national television. My curve ball wouldn’t stop hanging; my fastball lacked velocity; and my change-up, well, I don’t want to talk about my change-up.
Buster – So what’s next for the man who could have been the oldest rookie in Major League Baseball?
Clay – That’s it for me, Buster. Might as well face facts and throw in the towel. I am already moving to one of those crap states to retire. You know, Arizona, Florida, maybe California.
Special thanks to the Raleigh Applebee’s staff for volunteering to stay long after they were supposed to have closed.
